I am feeling the need to share two things today so bear with me as I get some stuff off my chest.

It seems lately my spiritual life has been in a rut. On hold. Stuck in a pothole. Caught in a spiritual winter. However you want to describe it. I have glimpses of the top of the hole and feel like kilroy peeking over the side but somehow I always end up back in the bottom of it. I just feel like I’m totally missing something. And I feel like I’m skimping out on God. I am not sure anymore that even those around me know how “spiritual” (for lack of a better word), faith-filled or God-fearing I really am inside. So Randy, my wonderful, inspirational, motivating brother, and I made a pact a few weeks back. We were talking of this holding pattern and he said - just wait, it’s coming. You are going to have a Halleluiah! Moment and when you do, just text me with the word Halleluiah!

I texted Randy this morning.

I’m reading a new book, Crazy Love. It is actually my boss’s book and it’s on CD so I'm really listening to it. I’m only on the second chapter but it’s already made a big impact. In reading it, I think I’ve realized what the heck my problem is and it’s going to be really, really hard to actually say it out loud (or type it even). But I’m going to try because I want this part of the post to be for my brother to read. Of course, anybody else is more than welcome to read it, but I just need to “talk” to Randy about it and this is the best way I can do that right now without fear that I’ll chicken out or leave part of it out.

My faith has never wavered. I’ve always believed in a higher being and I gave my life to Christ in March of 1992. I have never regretted that decision. Ever. I have questioned Him, yelled at Him, loved Him, ignored Him, pushed Him away, cried out to Him, ignored Him, clung to Him, prayed to Him and hung on as tight as I could to Him. My life has had its problems since then but I thank God that I had Him in my life to carry me through those times. But it just seems like in the last few years something has been wrong. Seriously wrong. I don’t think I could put my finger on it until this morning. Ugh, so here it goes.

I was having a problem with this idea of “surrendering” to God or living only for Him - that this is what I was meant for or this is why I am here. I mean, really. C'Mon. I was having an issue with thinking God was so arrogant or self-centered as to say mankind was here to serve Him. And I was outraged at myself for thinking like that. Who am I to question Him or think He is arrogant and self-centered? And then I wanted to step aside in case a lightning bolt slammed down on me and fried my neurons (kidding). All jokes aside, I was TORN UP inside not understanding everything but still had this growing sense that God was awfully conceited to “think the world revolves around Him”.

This morning, listening to that book I realized….DUH. IT DOES, YOU DORK! And the author describes it in such a way that it was like that lightning bolt really did hit me in the head but it was a wake up call. And it is not conceited of Him to know that all living things are here to serve Him, He made us. He gave us life. Imagine - (this is my analogy) your 13 year old child living in the house you work so hard to pay for, eating the food you labor to put on the table for him, wearing the clothes you painstakingly picked out and paid for, playing with the games you lovingly gave him and he has the audacity to not appreciate any of it, but instead pushes you away and says whatever, I’ll do what I want. It’s like that with God. He made all of this, He made the world in which we live, He gave us the food we eat, He bestowed upon us all the gifts this universe has to offer and I have the audacity to not appreciate any of it but instead push Him away and say whatever, I’ll do what I want? Dude, I know you’re probably reading this thinking, “uhhh yeah? I knew this already” but I don’t think I “got that” until this morning. I understand now. I. understand. It’s like a weight has been lifted off my heart knowing that deep down I don’t think God is conceited, arrogant and self-centered anymore. It is truly, truly hard to even broadcast that I thought that for so long but I can’t move on without realizing that and realizing I was wrong…so very, very wrong.

As I said, I’m only on the second chapter so I’m hoping against hope I will have more Halleluiah! Moments, and soon. God is good and I feel like singing the Halleluiah Chorus at the top of my lungs, but I think I'll wait 'til the car ride home. I don't think my coworkers would appreciate that very much.

And my second thought I wanted to share….today is the start of one of my most favorite times of the year. I saw the first Fireworks tent of the season and (while listening to my book and having a Halleluiah! Moment) it dawned on me that I love summer and all that summer implies.

Have a great day!! Halleluiah! Halleluiah!....

Holy Moses, it's been awhile. QUITE a while. I guess time flies when you don't know what you're doing. I would say "I've been busy" which is very much the truth but sounds so cliche that I'm not going to use it, especially since I'm sure there were some down times over the last two months that I could have sat down and blogged. Truth be known, when I did have time I either a) didn't want to. b)didn't even think about it. or c) I don't think there is a c, I just didn't want to or didn't think about it. Anyway, here I am. Finally updating. Hopefully I still have some readers.

Last time I blogged was about my swap, which was SO very much fun but I was sick. And to be honest, I am still not completely 100%. It took forever to even feel as good as I am now and I still have an awful, awful cough which is worse at night. It seems I'm back to normal for all but that. Well, normal is a term that has not always been used synonymously with my name, but for all intents and purposes, we'll use "normal" as we do "well". It's slow going but I'm getting there.

Matthew will be here Friday and is staying until August!! We are all so very excited. We're not sure if Drew will make it this year but we are hopeful.

Rob got laid off a few weeks ago but we are part of the lucky ones. And, of course, I don't think it's "luck" as much as it is "God's Plan". With our move and the amount of reduction in outgoing expenditures, and with Rob being a Union member, we are okay. I know my Landlord will probably not evict me if I'm late, and Rob will be getting unemployment, which if you are Union is alot different. He'll get regular unemployment plus a supplement from the Union Hall...so, with him not having to fill up his gas tank 2 1/2 times a week and not paying child support (at the moment, of course), we may actually come out even. I'm sure child support will kick back in once he goes back to work or once Matthew goes back to Arizona, but for now, it's a big break for us. And with as much time as he's put in, we will not lose our health insurance for over a year. Again, we are "lucky".

The good thing is...through all of this drama, and sickness, and craziness that is my life, I can honestly say there has not many times in my life that I have been happier. I'm just plain happy. Yep, I still hate my job. Yep, I still have problems but instead of worrying about all that could happen or has happened or will happen, I'm trusting that God has my back. And I'm cool with that. He's led us to it, He'll get us through it.

SO...hello blog. I am back. I hope it won't be forever until I post again but in the event that it takes a while, just know that I may be busy, or I may not want to, or I may not be thinking about it. :)

A peek inside the box...A note from Mindy on a DAISY! My very favorite flower....and then I realized she'd made the card AND taken the photo of the daisy! A CD of Mamma Mia! I have yet to see the movie but I will be listening to this soon! I love ABBA!Apparently, Mindy also loves purses, totes, bags and wallets. Isn't this little bag an absolute gem?
And a journal! I used to journal (manually) a long time ago, but haven't done so since the inception of my blog so I'm excited to start writing in it!

I think these are my favorite! LOOK at these cards!!! She MADE them! They are absolutely beautiful, and the photos are all hers, too! Mindy - I just moved into a new home and I'm actually thinking of framing these and putting them on my wall! And a book! Another "favorite" thing we have in common. I can't wait to start reading this one.

As we speak (or as I type), my treasures are covering the bed and I am so excited. Mindy and I share alot of favorite things...I just hope she enjoys the things I sent her as much as I am enjoying what she sent me! Mindy - let me know when you get it! It should be to you tomorrow!!

And for those of you that are wondering where I've been since I haven't blogged in a month, I'm digging out of a mountain of boxes after our move. So in other words, I've been "nesting". To say I love it here would be a gross understatement. I have completely unpacked my kitchen stuff and I still have 4 empty cabinets! And it's so QUIET. Especially at night. I'm not being jarred awake at 3am by screaming in the street anymore....photos to come, I promise. But for now, y'all...I'm off to my sickbed.

So it's late and I'm sitting here wanting to blog something but not really sure of what I want to say. Funny thing though, as I got on to see if anyone had commented I found out 1) I have a new follower...YAY!!! Not only do I stalk but I love to be stalked also! Welcome Stacy! No wait, not that you are a stalker but I love to be read 2) I really love all the songs on my playlist. Just in case you didn't know, each song was hand selected by me as a song that truly has significance to me, whether it's that it brings back a memory, I can play it or its just poignant to me. I love LOVE music so this little playlist you hear as you read my blog is actually a little piece of my heart. If you ever want to know what one of the songs mean to me or why it was included, just ask me. Maybe someday I'll just make a list of each one with an explanation. Who knows.

Also, gotta tell you just in case I hadn't announced it to the everyone, my mom's biopsy results came back negative. AMEN! We were concerned she was having a recurrence of breast cancer in a different form (Paget's) but it turns out it is nothing and I cannot even begin to type how very very much I am relieved. It took over two weeks to get the results, with several phone calls from me to the doctors office, to mom, back to the doctors office, to my sisters, to the doctors office, to mom....but we got them.

Ok, I'm off. Quick update for you and a resurrection of the smile list
1. Good music
2. The end of a Monday
3. Connecting with old friends
4. Making new friends
5. Happy children

In my own mind, I imagine folks dropping in on my blog and reading with great enthusiasm - my witty comments and great writing ability – I know I know, keep dreaming. I think in reality I just have a handful of readers (one is my mother and two are my sisters so reading my blog for them is a pre-requisite). I LOVE to read about other people, though. I’m sure by now you all realize I’m a closet blog stalker. I have a few blogs I read every day. Every once in a while I will elude to something I read on one or something that really caught my attention. Recently, I’ve actually come out of the closet on some – either on purpose or through friends and it’s actually quite liberating!

In the middle of these that I follow relentlessly is AbFab Geek (speaking of witty comments and great writing ability!) Her link is on my blogroll and I love to read about her little family of geeks. (Sidebar: Mrs. Geek, I need to know the painter that created the GREAT murals on middle geek's wall! Can he create a Arizona Cardinals Logo for me??) Anyway, she did a ME interview on her blog and I decided I wanted to do one too. She e-mailed me my questions yesterday – so here you have it. My ME interview - going back to that all-in-my-head theory that I have thousands of silent blog stalkers of my own that want to know more.

1. What made you decide to come out of the stalker closet?
I actually have wanted to comment many times since she and I are technically business neighbors and she’s right across the parking lot from my work but just never did. The ME interview looked fun and I thought, what the heck. I’ll become an unconcealed follower.

2. Is your brother still ministering to the homeless, if so tell me the most interesting part of it.
Yes, Randy is still ministering to the homeless. His website, www.misfitsforjesus.com is a great source of information of his ministry. The most interesting part of it, for me, is to see how it has changed Randy. He has a gift for helping these folks. He truly is a very special man and his heart reaches out to these lost souls but I think it mends the broken parts of his own soul. If that makes any sense at all.

3. What was the first car you owned and did you sell it or total it?
My first car was given to me by my sister, Stef. It was a red 1980 Pontiac Sunbird and I LOVED THAT CAR. When I left for college, I gave it back to Stef who in turn sold it, I think. Mom wouldn’t allow me to take it to college with me.

4. What do you own that you have had since childhood and why have you kept it?
The thing that means the most is a plaque with the Serenity Prayer on it. I think the story is that my Grammy gave it to me and when my niece was born, I gave it to her to be hung in her room. When she died, Stef gave it back to me and it sits on my bedside table so I always remember to: Ask God for the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. I also have a little pink bunny (about 2 inches tall) that I got for Easter when I was probably 8 or 9. Randy named it Jeffro and I can’t really say why I’ve kept it. I just love little Jeffro, I guess.

5. What is the worst job you have ever had and why?
Gosh. I’ve had so many. I worked at Papa Johns for 4 hours. That in itself has to be some sort of record. The worst was KFC. I worked there for 4 days, I think. I HATE TO PEEL POTATOES. I.hate.it. On my fourth day there, they brought me 50 pounds of potatoes to peel. UGH. So I peeled them, begrudgingly of course, thinking I can do this, I can do this… I got them all done and they brought me in another 50 pounds. I quit.

There you have it. My ME interview!

If you want to participate, these are the rules:
1. If you want to be interviewed, leave me a comment that says "Interview me".
2. I will respond by emailing you 5 questions (I get to choose the questions). Make sure you leave me your e-mail address.
3. Update your blog with the answers to the questions and let me know when you have posted it.
4. You will include this explanation and offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When other comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

One of my latest blog stalkees, http://www.ourdandelionwishes.com/, played a fun game where she had to list her 10 favorite things that begin with the letter C. I decided I wanted to play too, so she assigned me the letter M and I did it as she did, with photos.

MOTHER!

My mother is my number one fan! She is one of my best friends and I couldn’t have a list of my favorite things without listing her first, no matter what the letter. I guess I got lucky that it was M!

My Men!

Another one that my favorites list would be incomplete without. My daddy is the greatest daddy in the world! And I cannot imagine my life without Robbie. I love hanging out with him, building stuff, playing pool or just snugglin!
MY place!

The Lot! My most favorite place in the entire world to be. Some have called it a “God-Forsaken Hell Hole” but to me, it’s pure heaven.

Milkduds!

I love Milkduds. Always have. They remind me of Halloween as a kid when I first fell in love with them. I’m not a chocolate lover but I love Milkduds.

Mysteries!

I am an avid reader; I’m never without a book (or three) that I’m reading. I love a good mystery about as much as anybody. Sherlock Holmes, Hercule Poirot or Miss Marple – and all the rest!

Make-Up!

I don’t wear a whole lot of it anymore but I love browsing the make-up aisle or getting new stuff to try. I know, out of character for self-proclaimed NON GIRLY status, but it’s so much fun!

Microsoft Office Excel!

Yep – I am a Geek. I can’t help it. I’ve read the “Excel Bible” cover to cover. It sucked me in from page 1.

Mail!

Getting mail. Not e-mail so much as regular mail. And of course not the kind that says ‘Balance Due’. The personal kind that I got a lot more of prior to the invention of e-mail.
Mashed Potatoes!

I’m a freak for mashed potatoes. We got to Ponderosa occasionally and the kids get their ice-cream for dessert – they now call Mashed Potatoes “mom’s ice cream” because rather than dipping out the vanilla, I’m back in line for the spuds!

Music!

Whether listening to it or making it. I cannot live without my music.
TADA! That was fun! If any of you readers, all 2 of you would like a letter, just comment or e-mail me at catrinarking@yahoo.com!

Ok, E! I'm doing it too! Looks life fun!

I have been following a blog about a lady who lost her 14-month-old baby girl to a very, very tragic accident. Her honesty and heartfelt grief are so real but she maintains her hope in God and her Faith does not waiver. Even though most of her posts seem so sad as she copes with this tremendous loss in her life, it’s actually very inspirational to me because she never doubts God. She relies on Him completely to get her through and continues to praise Him for the victories in her life.

She recently talked of a Sunday school message where the class discussed 2 John and they were asked which was easier to believe, God’s Truth or the love of Jesus through God’s Truth. She said most of the class said the love was easier than the truth. I think I was on the other side. For me, it is God’s Truth that is easier to believe. I have never doubted that the Bible is His Word and is completely true. I have never doubted that what He promises in the Bible will come to fruition. I have never doubted that He will take care of me. When I do doubt (which is often), it’s usually about how anyone, especially the Creator of the universe, can love me enough…like God’s/Christ’s love for me.

Ok, I know that was deep for my first post back after several weeks but it’s been brewing in my mind for a while. I seem to be in the thinking cycle of my heart. I think a lot lately, about a lot of stuff. I remember a quote from the movie Legends of the Fall…” Some people hear their own inner voices with great clearness and they live by what they hear. Such people become crazy, or they become legends.” Let’s just hope I don’t become crazy (if I’m not already!)

So to lighten things up a bit, I’ll tell you of my great adventures in painting. Randy, Oh Randy, HOW do you do that day in and day out? I painted Lizzie’s room in the new house Saturday. I started at 11am and did not finish until 9:30 pm. With no break. I did emerge from my color palette once in a while for a drink or bathroom break, but for the most part, I stayed focused. She picked out a very neat comforter and we matched the colors to it. Two walls are green, two walls are purple and the window coverings are blue. I have a photo of one corner of the room taken from my cell phone. I’ll have to get better pictures with the big camera once I’m not cross-eyed and my right bicep has unknotted.

This is an impromptu post. Meaning, normally I do a post and type it all up nice and neat in Word beforehand so I can somewhat sorta do a spellcheck and try to act like I might know a bit about the English language. But not tonight. Tonight I am posting without comforts of spellcheck or Word although I'm sure its available somewhere on here, this new computer. But I don't much feel like searching for it. This is one of those up close and unplugged blogs and even as I am typing this, I'm doubting it will get published-just becase I haven't proofread it.

But I have to let loose of some things on my heart.

First - I figured out F-A-M-I-L-Y. We are the ones who know each others stories. Is that not true? My oldest boys were here over the holiday weekend and wanted me to recant the stories of A) a wreck I'd had B) of Sams birth or C) of some other story that I realized in the telling...these are my family members. They SHARE my story. My F-A-M-I-L-Y are the ones who already know these stories and still revel in the re-telling of them. My true family was there. It is their story too, is it not?

I also know beyond a shadow of a doubt that my mama has stories that my aunties know that in the re-telling I would undoubtedly understand but lose the luster because I wasn't there.

And one other thing. I think I finally have what my mama has, and what my sisters have and what my brother has. I have found my soulmate. I married him almost 6 years ago but he is honestly my soul mate. How come he so knows what I want even before I know I want it? How come he is so willing to put me ahead of him? Oh, did the Lord know what he was doing when He made that man for me.

There is so much more on my heart right now, but time reigns. I just wish everyone who reads my blog to know God's love. To know that even though you stumble and fall, God truly does know what you need. And He is truly mindful of your wants too. Trust Him.

I had a birthday Wednesday. I normally do not mind it coming and going, getting a year older usually because it’s New Years Eve and it’s all a big fun day. But this year, I’m feeling a little more philosophical about the whole thing – a bit more introspective. I will be 40 in just two short years. When I look back over the last 38 years, I did not expect to be where I am at this stage in my life. Granted, this stage is not bad but it’s not what I anticipated and that’s ok.

New Years Day I watched some made for TV movie on Lifetime, I’m not even sure of the name but in it, the main character was 29 and came across an old letter she’d written to herself as a teenager and it included a list of 7 things she wanted to accomplish before she turned 30. She realized she had not completed anything on her list. This is one of those movies I would normally be ashamed to admit I watched all the way through but this is also the kind of character and dilemma I can relate with so I was sucked in to the drama.

So, in the fashion of this character, whoever she is, I have decided to make my own list. Not like my “Bucket List” but this is Seven Things I Want To Do Before I Turn 40. I have two years to compete my list and I’m not exactly sure what all it will entail right now. I do know 4 of the things for sure, and the other 3 are just ideas looming…I guess I’ll post them as I think them through. For now – here is my list. This is not a life-altering list of things that I saw myself doing 25 years ago but just stuff I want to do.

1. Lose 100 pounds and keep it off
2. FIND A NEW JOB
3. Get a tragus piercing (that's the thing that sticks out in front of your ear)
4. Get two more tattoos
5.
6.
7.

So there you have it. I’ll post five, six and seven when they are solidly formed in my head. Let me know if you decide to make a similar list...

I know, I know. It's been a while. Christmas has come and gone - actually, I think Thanksgiving has come and gone since the last I posted. I apologize. I've just been crazy busy. Every time started a post, I got sidetracked and never finished so instead of posting a half-done post, I just delete it and figure I'll get another one done someday. I guess today is my someday.

I did get my calendars done for everyone. I think they were a hit, as they usually are. I loved doing them this year and I put alot of extra time into them doing extra things but it was very well worth it!!

Boys are here with their friend Ryan. It has been an absolute blessing to have them all here. Plus Lizzie's friend Tabby spent this weekend with us so though we have a house full of kids, both Robbie and I are enjoying every minute of it. We actually talked about it last night and wished we could've had more kids, especially together.

Robbie took me to see Jeff Dunham last night at the Family Arena. If you don't know who he is, you HAVE to check him out. I have never laughed so hard in my life. I had tears streaming down my face and the girl sitting next to me made me feel better because she apparently has a tendancy to snort while laughing hysterically also.

We're moving sometime soon...not exactly sure when though I prefer sooner rather than later. We're in negotiations with a house investor who will contact our mortgage company direct and work out a deal. We won't make any money but then we're out from under the ARM without any bad credit consequences so we're happy about that. Plus we get to move in to the house across from Stef. I have NO idea what I'm going to do with all that SPACE! To say I am excited is quite an understatement.

I'm sure I could keep posting to bring you up to date since 5 weeks ago but I'm out of time. I'll post more when I can. Besides, I want to add photos...

Some time ago I was struggling pretty hard with some issues going on in my life. I know, I know, typical of me, eh? Anyway, my usual modus operandi was to continue to struggle in my own power and just muddle through the best I could. But that wasn’t working. I felt the weight of the world on my shoulders and I just didn’t think I had it in me to continue. I felt I was about to break – body, mind, soul and spirit. I was on my way to work and I felt like turning my car around and going home to hide under the covers. Either that or just turning it into a ditch. So I started to pray. Hard. I knew the only thing that could bring me through this was God, but I was having a hard time praying because I just felt so completely lost. So over and over in my head I just said “God, I do not have the strength to do this anymore.” And there, right in front of me, was a dump truck. Yes, the kind you see on the roads every day carrying their big loads of stuff. And written on the back in large letters, it said, “ The Lord is Our Strength”. Instantaneously, my tears dried, my heart lifted and I have never felt the presence of God more than in that moment. And since then, I will occasionally see “my” dump truck on the road and the amazing part is, it’s usually when I need to be reminded that God’s got my back. I bring this up because I saw “my” dump truck again this morning and following along behind it, I snapped a photo of it with my cell phone. It's not a great picture, but in times of trouble - this is my reminder. If ever the owner of this dump truck were to know what an inspiration and lifesaver his dump truck has been...

The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. ~Psalm 28:7
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. ~Philippians 4:13

Isn't it comforting to know that God loves us and is our strength through the fire...

Rob and I took the kids to McDonalds last week after church and standing in line giving our order, I realized we’ve reached a new era in our parenting lives and I was actually deeply saddened. Neither child ordered a “Happy Meal”. My babies are growing up…

Mama, how do I cope?

Our stretch of the road has not had the best luck in producing "good" neighbors. We’ve had a man arrested for beating his wife, three children and two of their friends in a drunken stupor, we’ve had a brother of a neighbor jerk Sam from his bike by the back of his coat, we’ve had the DEA investigate a few of the houses…I could go on, but you get my point.

SO needless to say I am very leery of any new people moving in, which is usually every 6 months or so. On our side of the street at this particular stretch, we are the only family that doesn’t rent. I’m not implying that people who rent are below those who don’t or anything of the sort. I’m just saying in the last 8 years, I’ve seen many MANY types of folks move in and out of these 6 houses. Some good, some not so good.

Lizzie has befriended a little girl who is just a year older than she. Tabitha recently moved in 4 houses down with her mom and 2 sibilings. Robbie and I are usually very careful about letting either Sam or Lizzie go play at any of the 6 houses. On one occasion while playing with a child of a past tenant, Sam learned that causing a fight while drunk and subsequently getting arrested is automatically 24-hours in the hoosegow (different drunken stupor and different neighbor than the one stated above). Not exactly the sort of thing I want my kids to EVER find out, let alone when they are 11. So Lizzie’s new friend has been asking and asking if Lizzie could play. I still haven’t met the mom so I’d rather they play in our yard or at our house. Sam also has a new friend, Josh, who has moved in a few houses UP the street, also a renter district. We’ve met his mom and talked several times on the phone and they end up at one home or the other, which I’m fine with. And both kids are very polite, very sweet kids. No problems thus far. Both of them seem lonely, though.

Lately I’ve been coming home to not two kids, but four kids roaming around our house. Usually the boys are downstairs on the X-Box 360 and the girls are pestering Robbie or playing in Lizzie’s room. Somehow our house has turned in to the kid-fun house. Its fun actually and I like it. Last night was an all out pillow fight between the girls and Robbie. Josh couldn't come over but Sam was able to go play at his house.

Tabby’s mom doesn’t inquire much as to her whereabouts when she’s with us and I’ve never met her, nor has Robbie so I’ve wondered what type of home-life she has. I’m gathering from snippets of conversations that her parents are divorced, she has two younger siblings and her mom is a maid. The last few nights, she has been there as I’m getting dinner ready and I’ve invited her to eat with us since we have enough and she’s there already. The first night I had Lizzie start to set the table and as I was putting dinner on it, Tabby said “Whoa, we’re eating at the table? We’re sitting down? At the table?” And looked at me like I’d just asked her to remove her arms and sweep the floor with them. When I said, “Well. Yea!?!?” She thought that was the coolest thing she was ever going to be privy to. And she’s now had two consecutive dinners with us – I’m sure she’ll be there tonight, also. And tomorrow.

I try to get the family to sit down to dinner as many times as possible during the week which, depending on the week, can range from 0 nights to 7 nights. And lately, I’ve been pushing more for it and staying home due to economic constraints but to see a little girls’ delight at being able to sit down for a family meal was very enlightening. I believe those stories about family bonds being tied over the dinner table. And how it instills values in the kids that stay with them all their lives. And I am more than happy to help the little girl down the street, or the little boy up the street with that, even if it’s only a meal or two. Do families really not do this much anymore? Was she so in awe of the act of sitting down to dinner because her family just doesn't do it? Are they too busy? How sad to think a tradition as simple as a family dinner which could have such an impact on a young life has faded away. How like our rush-rush-gimme-it-now society to push something so influential out.

And to think I took for granted the fact that we ate supper as a family every single night of my childhood through my teens…

I love the following story. The first time I heard it I lived in Mississippi and I was having a very hard time with some things going on in my life. If you knew me back then, then I'm sure you can figure out what, or rather who, I was struggling with. I was also struggling with the fact that for the first time in my life I was living totally surrendered to God's will but could NOT for the life of me understand WHY I was going through this MESS when I was living surrendered as I was....and then I read this story. It's been a while since I read it and my wonderful friend Elizabeth e-mailed it to me a few weeks back. I thought it worth sharing, because it's very comforting to me when I get to feeling down and out that He is shining me up...

"Some time ago, a few ladies met in a certain city to read the scriptures, and make them the subject of conversation. While reading the third chapter of Malachi they came upon a remarkable expression in the third verse: “And He shall sit as a refiner and purifier of silver.”

One lady’s opinion was that is was intended to convey the view of the sanctifying influence of the grace of Christ. Then she proposed to visit a silversmith and report to them what he said on the subject. She went accordingly and without telling the object of her errand, begged to know the process of refining silver, which he fully described to her. “But sir,” she said, “do you sit while the work of refining is going on?” “Oh, yes, madam,” replied the silversmith; “I must sit with my eye steadily fixed on the furnace, for if the time necessary for refining be exceeded in the slightest degree, the silver will be injured.”

The lady at once saw the beauty, and comfort too, of the expression, “He shall sit as a refiner and purifier of silver.” Christ sees it needful to put His children into a furnace; His eye is steadily intent on the work of purifying, and His wisdom and love are both engaged in the best manner for them. Their trials do not come at random, and they are only as intense and last only as long as is necessary for the refining process.

As the lady was preparing to leave the shop, the silversmith concluded by saying that he knows the process of purifying is complete when he can see his own image reflected in the silver. What a beautiful example! When Christ sees His own image in His people, His work of purifying is accomplished."

Have a wonderful weekend, all!

Nerd Boy

Friday was duct tape day at school.

Remember this guy?



Didn't realize just how much he'd be missed, until I read and remembered some of the stuff he said...and stood for:

'Here's my strategy on the Cold War: We win, they lose.'- Ronald Reagan

'The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.' - Ronald Reagan

'The trouble with our liberal friends is not that they're ignorant; it's just that they know so much that isn't so.' - Ronald Reagan

'Of the four wars in my lifetime, none came about because the U.S. was too strong.' - Ronald Reagan

'I have wondered at times about what the Ten Commandments would have looked like if Moses had run them through the U.S. Congress.' - Ronald Reagan

'The taxpayer: That's someone who works for the federal government but doesn't have to take the civil service examination.' - Ronald Reagan

'Government is like a baby: An alimentary canal with a big appetite at one end and no sense of responsibility at the other.' - Ronald Reagan

'The nearest thing to eternal life we will ever see on this earth is a government program.' - Ronald Reagan

'It has been said that politics is the second oldest profession. I have learned that it bears a striking resemblance to the first.' - Ronald Reagan

'Government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it.' - Ronald Reagan

'Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed, there are many rewards; if you disgrace yourself, you can always write a book.' - Ronald Reagan

'No arsenal, or no weapon in the arsenals of the world, is as formidable as the will and moral courage of free men and women. '- Ronald Reagan

'If we ever forget that we're one nation under God, then we will be a nation gone under.' - Ronald Reagan

I am currently singing the theme to Misssion Impossible in my head...dunh dunh dunh, dunh da dunh dunh dunh. You know the one. And the reason is...well, hopefully it's not impossible, but I am A WOMAN ON A MISSION.

At the beginning of 2008, I decided I wanted to lose 100 pounds this year. Well, that was the assignment I apparently chose not to accept, because I'm down but only 12 pounds. Somehow I missed it by 88. Anyway, I have exactly one year until my 20th high school reunion. (Has it truly been THAT long??) So my assignment (should I chose to accept it) is to lose the 100 pounds by October 2009. That means I have to lose 8.33 pounds per month for the next year. And I am STOKED for it. I CAN DO THIS! I KNOW I can! I may have given up on a lot of dreams in my life but this is one I simply cannot let go and I will not let go.

So, watch out world. I have a mission and I AM ON IT!