Ever wish your year would just be over so you could start fresh? I’m so hoping that 2005 goes a little smoother than 2004 did. Between Sam in the hospital, Mom in the hospital, Lizzie in the hospital TWICE, Sam breaking his arm, my two broken teeth, Robbie’s tooth issue, Lizzie’s teeth issues, the lumps in my armpit and my high blood pressure (no wonder?), I’m just ready to go relax for a while. Unless my legs are falling off with gangrene or I’ve suddenly developed amoebic dysentery, I am going to refuse to go to the doctor/dentist/hospital for quite some time. I’m on a first name basis with the nurses in the pediatric ward at St. Johns. They know us by sight.

I am not ready for Christmas, though. I have shopping to do and I don’t want to do it. Its hard trying to figure out what everyone wants. On top of that, I have to finish the calendars still. Last year, I already had them done, printed and bound by now. I’ll get them done, eventually. I am queen of procrastinators. I think I’ll make a New Year resolution to just be the joker on that royal court instead of the queen. But, that’s a long shot and I’ll probably break it by January 2nd.

Because of all the medical mayhem, I’ve had to miss a lot of work and without pay since I ran out of vacation days back when mom was in the hospital. Robbie has not taken a vacation this year at all, so he cashed in his vacation time for money to pay the airfare for the boys to come visit. But, since I missed so much work, we’ve had to use that money for living expenses and bills and we were going to have to forego this year’s trip. ALAS – Aunt Rose to the rescue once again. She’s offered to pay for $400 of the $540 trip and all we had to come up with is $140. And of course, Chris to the rescue too – she’s started a $140 fund to help defer those costs as well. Can you believe the generosity and compassion of my friends and family? If it weren’t for them, I’d be dead, homeless or completely psycho. As it is, I’m just a little crazy, but at least I’m not alone.
My parents came to visit last weekend. Well, not really to visit, we had a power outage in a portion of our house and Dad and Robbie were trying to figure out what was wrong. Turned out it was a broken wire outside, but this was only found out after 2 days without most power. They said they’d never seen my house so messy – my dad wrote his name in the dust on my table, I called him the next day to make him proud – I DUSTED. My mom told me my plants needed water, they were drooping, and I called her the next day to make her proud – I WATERED! My mom also told me I needed to dust my ceiling fans, I told her the next day I CLEANED THE FANS! She also told me I needed to update my blog once in a while, so here it is mom, to make you proude, I UPDATED! (Don’t faint)

Ok, so I'm updating again. It's been a fanatic / General Hospital / These are the Days of Our Lives kind of week / month / year. Lizzie went in the hospital - oh - some two weeks ago. For a week, Sam broke his arm, I have a lump under my armpit that turns out to be more than one lump and I'm still awaiting the results. I told you, it's freakin' General Hospital man.

I've started work on the 2005 Calendar, a tradition I've started with our family. That is their Christmad presents. And actually, it's quite fun and they love it.

On top of all this medical bullshit I seem to be acquiring, I broke the front half of my tooth off tonight eating a FRENCH FRY. So God was striking me down man. He say - Catrina - I tol' you, yo' belly too big to be eatin' french fries. Therefo' - Ima takin haf yo tooth. Krammit.

Ok, I'm going to bed. I thought it would be good to update. If I put in here everything that was goin on in my life, they would no longer call it a blog. It would be something similar to the intern's diary.

What funny picture are you? Great, I'm a psycho kitty.



Killer kitty, oh yeah!

What Funny Picture are YOU? (really hilarious pics)
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Can you believe it? I am updating. I can't believe it's been a month. Time flies when you don't know what you are doing. What has happened in this past month? Got a new office manager at the office. Kind of upsetting in a way because I became really attached to the old office manager. Not that she went anywhere, she is still employed there, I am just still pretty upset for her. If I were her, I would feel so betrayed. Maybe it is for the better of the office, as it's been said to her, but, like I said, if it were me...

Hmmm, what else. Got the kids new school pictures, will definitely have to post them. Cardinals are almost in the World Series. I am not watching/listening to the games these days because I am very superstitious when it comes to baseball and I realized that every game I listened to or watched, they lost. Therefore, I have been banned from the games. I will ask every now and again for updates. Last night I was in Wal-Mart while the game was on and every now and again I strolled by the car radio section where the game was on. Of course, I made myself leave so they could go ahead and win and they did. I am even wearing my "rally band" inside out. I told you - I am superstitious about baseball. Try anything to get out of a slump and never, never mess with a winning streak. I just got the final update and WE ARE IN THE WORLD SERIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE HAWWWWWWWWWW!!! GO CARDINALS GO CARDINALS!!!! Awesome. Gotta go now. This time, it's for baseball you've been pre-empted for.

Today, besides being the first day of fall, is also National Elephant Appreciation day. Those of you who know me understand what a day set aside specifically for the appreciation of elephants means to me. I just tried about 17 times to paste a copy of a most cool picture I found of an elephant, but....alas....it did not work. My house is overrun with elephant statues. I can't explain the infatuation with them, I just love them. And I have lots. My very first elephant is sitting directly behind me as I type, he is about 2 feet high, he has leather tusks and he's very furry. He hails as "Basil Rathbone". That is his name, and yes, he is named after the first Sherlock Holmes actor. Therefore, in my little spectrum of the world, most of my friends and I refer to elephants as "Basil's". By the way, Basil also wears a pampers diaper with a hole cut for his tail and a Jack Daniels T-shirt. He has worn this same outfit since 1988. And that is not an exaggeration. So you can understand the importance of a National Elephant Appreciation day to me.

My "Korean Piece of Shit" car bit the royal dust on Monday while I was taking the kids to school. Luckily, Stef, my sister, was on her way to take Jacob to school and saw me sitting on the side of the road. She went ahead and took Sam and Liz to daycare so they could catch their busses while I limped the little Korean bastard home. I took it to a car fixer upper place that she knew, and oh my holy mother of old milk cow god. I think I forgot what it was like to drive a car that, like, actually....ran? I squealed the tires at every stop sign on the way home yesterday with it because I had literally spent the last 40,000 miles giving it so much gas to get it to go, I had to relearn how to drive the little bugger. I drove 85 miles the entire way to work this morning. (Which by the way I drive at least 45 miles one way to work) just because I could. I am so excited to drive a car that goes. I couldn't wait to get off work today. Not because I couldn't wait to get home (well that too), but because I couldn't wait to drive my car. Dude, man, like, I may actually wash it or something. Dang, we're having another one of those hold your socks on moments, aren't we?

Speaking of that, I am typing upon my new desk. I tried taking pictures of it but they didn't turn out so hot so you just have to take my word for it that it is spectacular.

Ok...I am going to bed now. Once again, the pillow reigns supreme. Actually, I think I have another piece of Blackberry pie in my refrigerator so I'm making up excuses to go upstairs. G'nite, blog. This time....it's white flaky flour crust baked into blackberry splendor that you've been pre-empted for. Don't feel bad, it could be worse. It could be...chocolate. UCKEY

I love these quiz things you can paste into your blog. You're right, Michelle, these are fun. So, how is it I'm tequila? Dunno, but I know I like to drink it. My desk is finished. Although I've added to it in the last few days so Robbie's work is not done yet. He hates it when I say "You know what I would really like?....."

Tomorrow is Connors birthday. I have to remember to call him.

Right now, gotta say Mr. Blog, I'm sportin' a real nice buzz. Miller Lite loves me. And it's tastin' great with less filling. Dang dude, I'm a walking commercial. I think I should be their spokesperson.

ok, my pillow is once again screamin my name. Or maybe that's the Miller Lite saying get your butt to bed. Doesn't matter, I'm going. G'nite. This time you've be pre-empted for a healthy REM pattern.

Congratulations!! You're a shot of some good old
hard liquor!


What Drink Are You?
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You're a punk rock mommy! DIY is probably your
motto, because you're a punk mama at heart.
Your kids are getting your independent spirit
and guts, and learning to solve problems
themselves. You love it when they show their
independence, even when it's breaking your
heart.


What kind of a freaky mother are you?
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I took this sexy inner cartoon chic quiz and here are my results. Those of you who read this and take the quiz, use the "comments" to let me know your results!!! I'm Jessica Rabbit.


Jessica Rabbit


Who 's Your Inner Sexy Cartoon Chick ?
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My own favorite personal quote has always been "When I'm good, I'm very good, but when I'm bad, I'm better!" -Mae West

So holy smokes. What all has happened since I last blogged. Went camping this weekend past with Mom and Dad, had an incredibly wonderful time. Anytime I get to hang with Mom and Dad is a great time for me. Mom is doing much much better, which is a good thing. Her weepiness is gone (I told her it was all the medications!) Dad got the results back from his stress tests, etc. and Mom says they were normal. So why all the hoopla? I think there is something they aren't telling me, so MOM - if you are reading this, I'm on to you.

I went to the doc today as a follow up from my annual check up last week. When I went last Thursday, my blood pressure was way up, again. 180/110, so of course they said make an appointment with your primary care doctor, which I did and I went in this morning, it was 160/120. OK, it's been elevated for quite a while so they gave me a month's sample of medicine and they took some blood and I had a chest x-ray done. I'm too young to have all this going on. I'm much too young to feel this damn old, to quote Garth.

Lizzie was sick two days last week. I took her to the doctor afraid she was going to have Strep but she had a double ear infection and "just a nasty cough". So she was home two days. Sucks that I had to miss more work but hey, I'm a mom. That comes first and foremost.

My friend Elizabeth's mom died Tuesday. They've had a rocky relationship, to say the least, since her parents split up and they were, luckily enough, able to mend fences over the summer. Her mom has been sick due to complications from Lupus among other things and Elizabeth was able to be with her mom and help take care of her, which she says she feels honored to be able to say. I'm just sad for her losing her mom. For me, that would be like losing my heart. The family is requesting in lieu of flowers, to make donations in her honor to the Lupus foundation, which I discovered can be done online. I think I may do that when I get paid next. My sister has Lupus. It's a nasty nasty condition and I hate thinking about the problems associated with it.

Last week at Weight Watchers I was down 5.6 pounds and I was so excited, then - boom, the other shoe drops. I went in this week and lo and behold, they found out the scale was broken last week and got a new one. DAMMIT - I really really liked the old one, especially after I stepped on the new one and it gave me back my 5.6 pounds, exactly. By the end of this weeks meeting I was raffling tickets for first in line to shoot/steal/pound/drop/maul/damage/vandalize the new scale. And they thought I was kidding.

Sam and Liz are doing great in school. Lizzie got in trouble two out of the first four days, though. I think she's still adjusting. Either that, or I have a troublemaker on my hands. She's not really a troublemaker, she's just her own person. Sam says he's going to spend third grade known as the "good boy". I told him I thought he spent his whole life so far being a good boy and he said he got into trouble some last year so he's trying to overcome that. He's still adjusting to his new room downstairs. Being only 8, he's still afraid to sleep down there by himself. He was crying his 4th night down there and was too upset to tell me how scared he is, because he felt all of his daddy's work on building his room would be for naught. I told him it would still be his room but he can sleep upstairs until he gets used to the idea of sleeping down there. He thought that was cool. Lizzie asked me a little while ago if it was okay if she went ahead and went to bed, she was really tired. Hello - ya think I said no? NOT.

My new desk is almost finished. I will take digital photos of it when it's all done just so I can post them. I'm very proud of it, as I'm sure Robbie is since it is his handy work. I just can't wait until it's done. I'll be finding reasons to be sitting at it. Maybe, just maybe, I'll even update my blog more often. Holy cow, hold on to your socks, what a thought.

My car is a Korean piece of crap! It's an embarrassment to drive on the highway. I can't run the air conditioning while I'm shifting because it makes this loud sssshhhhing noise and everyone looks at me like I did it on purpse and then, just when I get to speed - it cuts out really bad, the engine light blinks on and off and it slows down to an annoying crawl making everyone behind me flip me the finger and honk. I've learned to just smile and wave like it's an everyday occurence to be going 20 mph down a major highway. Which, if you think about it logically, it IS becoming an everyday occurence. I need to visit the lottery god. Someone take pity on me and buy me a Monte Carlo. And never, never, never buy foreign. Maybe I should pour some rice and soy sauce in the gas tank and see what happens. For crying in a bucket, I'm a whinebag.

New England and Jacksonville are tied 3-3. I think I'm going to go veg upon the couch and watch the men in tights play football. Just too bad it's not Brett Favre.
Goodnight blog. You've been pre-empted for tight pants and testosterone.

So maybe I felt my last blob was a free ticket to not update for awhile. At least those of you who actually read this realize I'm incredibly busy. At the moment we are eating dinner, watching a movie as a family and I'm am trying to "blob". So this will be short.

Lizzie has been sick and I had to miss 2 more days of work. I know this upsets my boss/coworkers but what am I to do? Leave her home by herself or, wait, better yet, with Sam? Oh no, hell no.

Ok, I am done now. I have so much more to say, but my T-Bone is calling my name and it is oh so much more important that blobbing. G'Nite, more in the morning.

Ok. So. I have an aunt who has an undiagnosed mysterious illness, which has been progressively getting worse. She even went to the Mayo clinic in Arizona to see if they could help. They thought she could have ALS, which is Lou Gehrig’s disease. Not at all a good diagnosis, but as we find out, it’s also sort of a “catch-all” diagnosis. Sometimes, when the doctors don’t know what’s wrong, they say, “Well, it could be ALS.” And, as of late, she is showing small signs of improvement, which someone with ALS never does. Anyway, the whole point of this is she keeps this blog for her journey back to health, along with my other aunt who is taking care of her. And when I go to read it and they haven’t updated it, I get disappointed because I like to hear what’s going on with them and the family in general. They don’t just post health issues; it’s also become the News Channel of our family. And I always wanted to comment “UPDATE!!!!” when it had been a little while but now that I’m keeping my own little blog, I think I’m more understanding about trying to find the time to “UPDATE!!!!”. I can’t do it at work, although I will post little short ones like the peanut butter thing since it takes about a nanosecond. And once I get home, there’s homework, dinner, showers, lunches, setting stuff out for the next day and finding quality time to be with the kids, then bedtime. Hello – where on this list does blog priority fall? It’s down there on the bottom with cleaning out the refrigerator. So, therefore, I am more sympathetic when it’s been a while since the Auntie’s fill in what’s going on.

And it’s Friday again! This week hasn’t been that bad so even though I always wish for Friday, it’s been a good week, with the exception of my little calamity at the grocery. I was down another 1.75 at weigh-in Wednesday, which makes a total of 31.85 pounds. My jeans are doing a major sag thing in the butt and these are the ones I had to squeeze into before! Ever notice when you lose weight your legs get shorter? Not really, but you pull your pants up over your belly (at least I do – can’t stand those hip hugger things) and when your belly is bigger, your pants go up higher on your ankle. Now that my belly is getting smaller, my jeans are getting longer. Kind of cool, but I thought my legs were really long until I realized it was just my belly was big. Dang.

Mom went to her doctor appointment on Wednesday. And this is what he said. There are three types of glands in the skin. Sweat, oil and wax glands. You sweat when you're hot, obviously, but the skin first secretes oil and wax to keep your skin from shriveling up (or frickling as Sam and Lizzie say) from being wet, as it would in the bathtub. In mom's case, one of the wax glands became clogged and over a period of time (he said a LONG period), the wax became trapped in there with nowhere to go. It eventually became unclogged but at that point the wax was too large to come out but bacteria could get in. And bacteria feeds off of the wax stuff so it became incredibly infected as the bacteria grew. That was the reason for the surgery and now they have to close it from the inside out to keep it from leaving another big hole on the inside susceptible to more infection. The actual term from the pathology report was: a soft tissue, abscess cavity, excision: "Squamous epithelium lined cyst consistent with epidermal inclusion cyst" and "Acute and chronic inflammation". Sections of the abscess cavity showed a cyst lined by squamous epithelium (the tissue that covers the external surface of the body and lines hollow structures) with keratinous debris (dead skin, hair cells). So - basically - she had a big infected abscess on her ass and they've fixed it. (I could've done a much better, simpler pathology report) She goes back next Wednesday and the doctor told her they’d talk about not having to do any more cleaning to it. They had told her previously she had to sit in a warm bath three times a day and then clean it with Hydrogen Peroxide. She has very sensitive skin and her dermatologist had advised against showering more than once every other day so she's developing a secondary problem with her skin since she's been in the tub so much. Now she doesn't have to do that anymore so let's hope we can get her skin back to normal, too. And he has given her the go ahead to be able to go camping as long as she keeps it clean and does the Hydrogen Peroxide thing daily. I told her that means she can't roll around naked in the dirt with Dad. The doctor also said this infection she had was a very serious thing and it could've been fatal! I'm glad she went in when she did.

I woke up this morning at about 4:30 to a strange noise that sounded like somebody sneezed but was trying to cover their mouth, and it came from the hallway. Robbie is already up at this time, so I thought it was him until I noticed he was on the front porch. I thought I was going crazy so I just about went back to bed when I thought I’d check on Lizzie. Lo and behold - she wasn’t in her bed and I couldn’t find her anywhere. She wasn’t downstairs with Sam, she wasn’t in the garage, she wasn’t on the front porch with Robbie and I, once again, started to panic. My first thought was of that little girl who’d been taken in the middle of the night from her bed and her parents never heard from her again. Once again – Robbie to the rescue. She had gotten up to get a drink of water and sneezed in the hallway and heard me get up, thought I would be mad at her and went downstairs in Sams room and hid in the closet. Then seeing how upset I was, she started bawling, I started bawling and everything turned out ok. She took off in the not too distant past while we were camping at the lot and by the time we found her, we had initiated our own sort of “CODE ADAM” at the valley. She decided to go for a walk and then got lost and ended up way on the other side of the valley by lake 2. I have never in my life been as scared as I was that day. Except maybe the night Sam had his major asthma/allergy attack and I couldn’t get him to breathe. Children do this to us. I know now why my mother is silver. I think I earned 40 silver strands, at least, this morning. I also know why animals eat their young.

Well, goodbye, blog. I will update as I can, but remember, my refrigerator is really messy, too, and I'm still working on that priority list.

So I took this test last night - here's what it said.

http://quiz.ravenblack.net/flavour.pl">I taste like Peanut Butter. I am one of the most blendable flavours; I go with sweet, I go with sour, I go with bland, I go with anything. I am practical and good company, but have something of a tendency to hang around when I'm not wanted, unaware that my presence is not welcome. What Flavour Are You?

Do I really have a tendency to hang around when I'm not wanted, unaware that my presence is not welcome? It also said if I wasn't Peanut Butter, I was alcohol. I think I like that one better.

Ever wake up in the morning suddenly thinking you're late - when in all actuality you're not - but you rush around anyway and the whole day seems like that until you realize it's 9:30 pm and almost time to go bed and you feel like you haven't stopped since you were rudely awakened by a mistaken sense of being tardy? I hate those kinds of days. Thats the kind of day I have had. Mainly because I hate to grocery shop. I went by to pick up "a few" things after work and, wonder of wonders, they were having a 10 for $10 sale on nearly EVERYTHING in the store so I found about a bazillion things that I needed which of course, I didn't need before I entered the wonderland of mass propoganda. Ok - so why exactly do I NEED 10 bottles of ketchup? And instead of spending $1.99 on one bottle, I spent $10 on 10! Yes, it's a great deal, but when you're also dealing with limited storage space, the money I saved is spent on Ibuprofen. So, of course, I spent more time in the grocery store than I wanted. And it never fails that no matter what check-out aisle I decide to patronize, the lady in front of me either has a big issue with paying 17 cents more than what the sign says or, in today's case, the lady was paying by some sort of government funds and spent $174.00. Not a problem in the least, but apparently the highest denominator of these government funds was $5.00 and she had to tear out and sign 35 of these things. And then the check-out lady had no idea what buttons to push on the computer thing so we had to have "Management to lane 4 please!" By the time I was done, I figured I'd just stop by the pharmacy and see if I could steal a prescription for high blood pressure.

Mom is doing much better. Her spirits seem to be lifting as her wound heals. She has a follow-up visit with her physician tomorrow and I'll be meeting her there since I've technically been her home-health care nurse. Besides, she may need more moral support than my dad. He tries really hard, he really does, but I think he daydreams alot, which makes him not very observant when it comes to seeing the signs of an impending emotional breakdown. But he's really been great through this whole ordeal with mom. I just hope she gets well enough to do a little camping before summer is officially over. I bought her some new shampoo today, and then while I was having my little grocery store crisis, I also bought her some new mascara. (It wasn't 10 for $10 but it was a Loreal close-out sale, $2.49 instead of $8.49!) She rarely ever wears make-up so she rarely every buys it, either. I think everything she owns is left over from when her daughters lived there and left the stuff there. I was "gussying" her the other day to make her feel better and her mascara was ookey. (catrina-ism) So, I got her some new. Should make her happy.

Uncle Walter e-mailed me. It was great to hear from him. We kept in good contact for a while some time back but we kind of lost touch. I'm glad we're e-mailing again. It's nice to have a talk with someone who has similar political views and has as much insight as he does. Kind of like talking to my dad. They both have the experiences that are awesome to just sit down and listen to. I think they should both write a book. Hell - if Clinton can do it, I'm sure Uncle Walter and my dad can.

Sam and Lizzie started school today. They both apparently really like their teachers, which is a good thing. Sam did his homework at his new desk. He thought that was "most awesome". Even used his little light. Sam is learning cursive writing and is very excited about it. Lizzie had a phone call from one of her new friends. They want to get together sometime. Dear Lord, it's already starting. At least it was a girl. They both got new shoes over the weekend so it was easy to wake them up this morning. Obviously hard for the world at large to see the relevance there, but anytime my kids get new shoes, all I have to do to roust them out of bed in the morning is lure them with the concept of getting to wear them. Robbie talked with Matt and Drew and their first week at school was good. Drew is going to a technical school, he wants to be a commercial pastry chef. Matthew is doing high school Algebra. He's in 4th grade. Hard to fathom, but I miss the little boogers. Two parents, four children, two dogs, and two turtles in this tiny house made for a cramped summer and I thought it would be good to get back to normal, but it feels kind of empty. Hard to do here.

Robbie is diligently working on my new desk downstairs. We got a great deal on birch wood and it's beautiful. And HUGE. A big L shape, one side is 10' and the other is 8'. Man - lots of room to spread out there. I can't wait until it's finished. It's going to be "most awesome", to use Sam's words.

My eyeballs are slamming shut and my pillow is screaming my name. I'll close with a thought. This is out of the calendar I made for the family, full of quotes, birthdays, and anniversaries and pictures of everyone. "What if the question is not why am I so infrequently the person I want to be but why do I so infrequently want to be the person I am?" That has been on my mind since I first read it. Food for thought. Goodnight blog.

OLD VERSION: The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.

The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!

MODERN VERSION: The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.

CBS, NBC, ABC, PBS AND FOX show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when they sing, "It's Not Easy Being Green."

Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film the group singing, "We shall overcome." Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.

Tom Daschle & John Kerry exclaim in an interview with Peter Jennings that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his "fair share."

Finally, the EEOC drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act," retroactive to the beginning of the summer.

The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.

Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of federal judges that Bill appointed from a list of single-parent welfare recipients. The ant loses the case.

The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't maintain it.

The ant has disappeared in the snow.

The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Vote Republican

And we have Matthew and Andrew. Between them all, we are quite a good looking little family. Even Norman, the Bassett. I have to get one of Harley, the Pointer. And Gus, the Red-Eared Slider turtle. And Fred, the Red-Eared Slider baby turtle.

Drew 

Matthew 

Ok - had to post a picture of Sam and Lizzie. I realized I had my dog on here, but not my kids. How incredibly awful of me. You do have to admit though, all three are just darling.

Sam & Liz 

I wish all week long for this day. I start Monday morning about 6:00am (okay, 6:30 after I hit this snooze a few times) longing for Friday at 4:30. I'm wishing my life away, I know, but I can't seem to help it. I did get a bonus today for a life policy and a group policy I sold. So that was good. I made up some of my time for having to take off to go to the ER with Sam when he fell at Tumbledrum. It made for a long day, though.

I took Sam to Meemaw's house this morning. He wanted to hang out with them today. I am also helping mom out with her wound, being like home health care. I was worried I wouldn't be able to do it at first but I learned alot about myself during the week mom and I were bedbound in the hospital. I'm not as weak stomached as I thought. When the necessity calls for it, I apparently do pretty good. And I think I've realized my true calling is to be a nurse, actually it always has been. That is all I wanted to do during my teenage years and then I just decided I didn't want to do that anymore. I heard mom say she thought it was because of Jessie and that her death kind of dashed my dreams. She thinks I decided if the medical profession couldn't help her, I wanted nothing to do with it. I have been wondering ever since if maybe my mom is right. Jessie's death took alot out of me, so why not that too? It's been 16 years. I was only 12 when she was born, 17 when she died. I also think I felt like I never had a right to voice just how much her death affected me because if it was that hard on me, I could not even fathom how hard it was on Stef. My God, it would've killed me. Stef is my sister, Jessie was her daughter, my niece.

Lizzie comes home tomorrow. I can't wait. I think I'll be able to sleep again once all my babies are back in the nest. I did get an anonymous comment on my problem with her being homesick and I think my anonymous commenter is right. The grandparents need to come here to visit Lizzie instead of making her miserable by her having to go there. And they are very understanding people and they care so much for Sam and Lizzie that I'm sure they will be more than happy to comply with that. So - whoever you are, anonymous commenter, thank you for your insight.

I lost another 3/4 of a pound this week. It doesn't sound like much, but my total is 30.1. Weight Watchers is an awesome, awesome program. There are 8 people in my office including me, and because of my enthusiasm and success, 4 others have started weight watchers. Of those 4, two of their mother's have started and one of their sisters. I think Weight Watchers should start giving me a portion of the proceeds. My goal is another 50 or so pounds. I really haven't set a firm goal yet, because I'm taking it one day at a time and I'll decide how far to go when I get there. What I'd really like to be able to do is wear Robbie's jeans. He is a skinny guy who can eat ANYTHING and usually does. He can eat anything and alot of it. Hard being married to someone like that when I can just think about eating a candy bar and I gain 5 pounds from the thought alone.

Well, I thought my boys were sacked once again on the couch but it looks like it's just Robbie that's doing the snoozing. Sam is completely engrossed in a movie about a volcano with Tommy Lee Jones and Ann Heche. I forgot the name of it.

I think the idea of a blog is a pretty good one. It's kind of like keeping a journal but it's open to public opinion and comment, which is fine with me.

I think I'll say goodnight. Until then -

I just looked back over my blog and decided I sound like a right wing Republican and like that's all I talk about. But it's really not. In fact, I'd have to say, quite the opposite. I'm the least political person I know but I guess I was having one of those days where I went philisophical and decided I'd air my deepest political feelings.

My mom is doing much better, which I am glad to say. After her bout in the hospital and her issues with the doctors/nurses, I'm glad she is home. I am also glad I had the opportunity to spend the time with her that I did. She keeps thanking me and dad keeps thanking me like it was a sacrifice and I guess in their eyes it is, but in mine, it was something she would have, or has, done for any of us. Even though she was not feeling well and she had a lot of other issues to deal with, I am grateful that I got to spend as much one-on-one as I did with her. I hope it portrayed to her how very much I love her. I have always known my biggest fan is my mom. Maybe my only fan now that it's become known I'm a "right wing Republican who doesn't use her head", but there's my mom standing behind me saying YOU GO GIRL!

The daycare called from Tumbledrum and Sam had fallen in one of the tube things or something and hurt his foot. They were afraid he'd broken it, but turns out it's just sprained. Right now, he and his dad are sound asleep on the couch. How cute.

Lizzie called me at least 5 times tonight. Poor thing - she's very homesick. She is in North Carolina with her paternal grandparents, who I found out tonight, feel like they've traumatized a 6 year old. She wanted to come home the minute she stepped off the airplane. Tell me how to handle this! I don't want to take them away from their grandparents, and I would never want to take their grandparents away from them, but man, there's only so much a mom can take and I know she's miserable out there. What do I do? Anonymous comments are welcome. Ha Ha. ( Lizzie is my 6 year old daughter whose "biological contributor" walked out on us the day she was born). She and Sam (who is 8) are brother and sister and their paternal grandparents are wonderful to them. The grandparents cannot help the fact their son is a, well, (insert expletive here). Sam and Lizzie have been adopted by their stepfather who loves them more than they've ever dreamed of being loved by a father.

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Now that my ramblings are done I guess I better put the boys to bed, they are still sacked out on the couch. So - good night for now, blog.

Here is an e-mail I received from Michelle today. Thought it was quite interesting!

At about the time our original 13 states adopted their new constitution,in the year 1787, Alexander Tyler (a Scottish history professor at TheUniversity of Edinburgh) had this to say about "The Fall of The AthenianRepublic" some 2,000 years prior."A democracy is always temporary in nature; it simply cannot exist as apermanent form of government. A democracy will continue to exist upuntil the time that voters discover that they can vote themselvesgenerous gifts from the public treasury. From that moment on, themajority always votes for the candidates who promise the most benefitsfrom the public treasury, with the result that every democracy willfinally collapse due to loose fiscal policy, (which is) always followedby a dictatorship.""The average age of the world's greatest civilizations from thebeginning of history, has been about 200 years. During those 200 years,these nations always progressed through the following sequence:From Bondage to spiritual faith; From spiritual faith to great courage;From courage to liberty; From liberty to abundance; From abundance tocomplacency; From complacency to apathy; From apathy to dependence; Fromdependence back into bondage."Professor Joseph Olson of Hamline University School of Law, St. Paul,Minnesota, points out some interesting facts concerning the most recentPresidential election:Population of counties won by:Gore=127 millionBush=143 millionSquare miles of land won by:Gore=580,000Bush=2,2427,000States Won ByGore=19Bush=29Murder rate per 100,000 residents in counties won by:Gore=13.2Bush=2.1Professor Olson adds: "In aggregate, the map of the territory Bush wonwas mostly the land owned by the tax-paying citizens of this greatcountry. Gore's territory mostly encompassed those citizens living ingovernment-owned tenements and living off government welfare..."Olson believes the U.S. is now somewhere between the "complacency and"apathy" phase of Professor Tyler's definition of democracy; with some40 percent of the nation's population already having reached the"governmental dependency" phase.

Norman - the camping dog 

After the chaos and carnage of September 11th, it is not enough to serve our enemies with legal papers.

America must not ignore the threat gathering against us. Facing clear evidence of peril, we cannot wait for the final proof, the smoking gun that could come in the form of a mushroom cloud.

America stands for liberty, for the pursuit of happiness and for the unalienable right for life. This right to life cannot be granted or denied by government because it does not come from government, it comes from the creator of life.

America will never seek a permission slip to defend the security of our people.

Every nation in every region now has a decision to make. Either you are with us, or you are with the terrorists.

Everywhere that freedom stirs, let tyrants fear.

For all who love freedom and peace, the world without Saddam Hussein's regime is a better and safer place.

For diplomacy to be effective, words must be credible - and no one can now doubt the word of America.

Freedom itself was attacked this morning by a faceless coward, and freedom will be defended.

I can hear you, the rest of the world can hear you and the people who knocked these buildings down will hear all of us soon.

I understand I'm running against a person who is so anxious to become president, he will do whatever it takes.

If the Iraqi regime is able to produce, buy or steal an amount of highly enriched uranium a little larger than a single softball, [it] could have a nuclear weapon in less than a year.

If you're sick and tired of the politics of cynicism and polls and principles, come and join this campaign.

Leadership to me means duty, honor, country. It means character, and it means listening from time to time.

On September 11 2001, America felt its vulnerability even to threats that gather on the other side of the Earth. We resolved then, and we are resolved today, to confront every threat from any source that could bring sudden terror and suffering to America.

One of the common denominators I have found is that expectations rise above that which is expected.

Presidents, whether things are good or bad, get the blame. I understand that.

Redefining the role of the United States from enablers to keep the peace to enablers to keep the peace from peacekeepers is going to be an assignment.

Saddam Hussein is a homicidal dictator who is addicted to weapons of mass destruction.

Senator Kerry has been in Washington long enough to take both sides on just about every issue.

Some have argued that confronting the threat from Iraq could detract from the war against terror. To the contrary, confronting the threat posed by Iraq is crucial to winning the war on terror.

Some have argued we should wait, and that's an option. In my view, it's the riskiest of all options, because the longer we wait, the stronger and bolder Saddam Hussein will become.

Terrorist attacks can shake the foundations of our biggest buildings, but they cannot touch the foundation of America. These acts shatter steel, but they cannot dent the steel of American resolve.

The action we take and the decisions we make in this decade will have consequences far into this century. If America shows weakness and uncertainty, the world will drift toward tragedy. That will not happen on my watch.

The deliberate and deadly attacks which were carried out yesterday against our country were more than acts of terror. They were acts of war.

The momentum of freedom in our world is unmistakable - and it is not carried forward by our power alone. We can trust in that greater power Who guides the unfolding of the years. And in all that is to come, we can know that His purposes are just and true.

The terrorists and their supporters declared war on the United States - and war is what they got.

There can be no peace if our security depends on the will and whims of a ruthless and aggressive dictator. I'm not willing to stake one American life on trusting Saddam Hussein.

There's no bigger task than protecting the homeland of our country.

They said, "You know, this issue doesn't seem to resignate with the people." And I said, you know something? Whether it resignates or not doesn't matter to me, because I stand for doing what's the right thing, and what the right thing is hearing the voices of people who work.

They're for tax cuts and against them. They're for NAFTA and against NAFTA. They're for the Patriot Act and against the Patriot Act. They're in favor of liberating Iraq, and opposed to it. And that's just one senator from Massachusetts.
This was not an act of terrorism, but it was an act of war.

This way of life is worth defending.


We cannot blame the schools alone for the dismal decline in SAT verbal scores. When our kids come home from school do they pick up a book or do they sit glued to the tube, watching music videos? Parents, don't make the mistake of thinking your kid only learns between 9:00 a.m. and 3:00 p.m.

We will make no distinction between the terrorists who committed these acts and those who harbour them.

When I take action, I'm not going to fire a $2 million missile at a $10 empty tent and hit a camel in the butt. It's going to be decisive.

When you turn your heart and your life over to Christ, when you accept Christ as the savior, it changes your heart.

With those attacks, the terrorists and their supporters declared war on the United States. And war is what they got.

You can't put democracy and freedom back into a box.

I'm doing this blog thinking no one will ever look at it. This way, I don't offend anyone. This is just for my little thoughts and inspirations, beliefs, etc. I've learned there are two things one should never discuss with family, especially if they are not of like minds on the subjects. Politics and religion. Escpecially politics. We are such a diverse family, that it does make for excellent discussion sessions, but I always fear doing irrepairable damage to the relationship so I most times keep my mouth shout. That way I don't stir up the beehive. This war thing in Iraq is really an issue in the family. Dad was in Korea and lifetime military man, straight Republican. Most of the rest of the family is liberal Democrat and I think I'm somewhere in the middle.

While I agree that the deaths and dismemberments and maiming of our soldiers in Iraq are a tragedy beyond description, I also feel that the incredulous acts inflicted upon our country on 9/11 are just as horrible and had we, as a country, taken the proverbial bull by the horns beforehand and willingly gone into another country by force, maybe we could have prevented that terrible day forever etched in everyone's minds.I do understand Saddam Hussein is not behind the 9/11 attacks, but I feel by going into Iraq by choice, we have prevented a future attack on our country in our homeland. I can't help but think if we had acted on the intelligence information ahead of time and prevented 9/11 by forcefully invading Saudi Arabia, the liberal belief at that point would be "Why are we over there, fighting this war, when they've done nothing to us?" And I would have to say - Yet. As I do now. Why are we over there fighting this war when they've done nothing to us? - Yet. I also must remember that our soldiers are there defending our country by choice, as well. By signing up for the military, they know the risks involved and are signing up to defend our country. I'm sure that none want to die for their country, but all know the risks of that happening. If my sons were to sign up at 18, I would be incredibly proud of them following in their Grandfather's footsteps as well as many of the great uncles on both sides. I don't think my dad is any lesser of a person for being a combat soldier, in fact, I feel quite the opposite, he is more of a person. I also think it is Veteran's like him that have fought and defended our country that I must thank for the fact that I speak English and not German, Korean, Japanese or Iraqi and we have the freedom to do as we please inside our luxurious air conditioned homes. I don't think that would be the case had we been passive and insisted upon peaceful means instead of forceful ones. I understand there are times for peace, but there are also times for force. In our day and age, to secure peace is to prepare for war.