This is an impromptu post. Meaning, normally I do a post and type it all up nice and neat in Word beforehand so I can somewhat sorta do a spellcheck and try to act like I might know a bit about the English language. But not tonight. Tonight I am posting without comforts of spellcheck or Word although I'm sure its available somewhere on here, this new computer. But I don't much feel like searching for it. This is one of those up close and unplugged blogs and even as I am typing this, I'm doubting it will get published-just becase I haven't proofread it.

But I have to let loose of some things on my heart.

First - I figured out F-A-M-I-L-Y. We are the ones who know each others stories. Is that not true? My oldest boys were here over the holiday weekend and wanted me to recant the stories of A) a wreck I'd had B) of Sams birth or C) of some other story that I realized in the telling...these are my family members. They SHARE my story. My F-A-M-I-L-Y are the ones who already know these stories and still revel in the re-telling of them. My true family was there. It is their story too, is it not?

I also know beyond a shadow of a doubt that my mama has stories that my aunties know that in the re-telling I would undoubtedly understand but lose the luster because I wasn't there.

And one other thing. I think I finally have what my mama has, and what my sisters have and what my brother has. I have found my soulmate. I married him almost 6 years ago but he is honestly my soul mate. How come he so knows what I want even before I know I want it? How come he is so willing to put me ahead of him? Oh, did the Lord know what he was doing when He made that man for me.

There is so much more on my heart right now, but time reigns. I just wish everyone who reads my blog to know God's love. To know that even though you stumble and fall, God truly does know what you need. And He is truly mindful of your wants too. Trust Him.

I had a birthday Wednesday. I normally do not mind it coming and going, getting a year older usually because it’s New Years Eve and it’s all a big fun day. But this year, I’m feeling a little more philosophical about the whole thing – a bit more introspective. I will be 40 in just two short years. When I look back over the last 38 years, I did not expect to be where I am at this stage in my life. Granted, this stage is not bad but it’s not what I anticipated and that’s ok.

New Years Day I watched some made for TV movie on Lifetime, I’m not even sure of the name but in it, the main character was 29 and came across an old letter she’d written to herself as a teenager and it included a list of 7 things she wanted to accomplish before she turned 30. She realized she had not completed anything on her list. This is one of those movies I would normally be ashamed to admit I watched all the way through but this is also the kind of character and dilemma I can relate with so I was sucked in to the drama.

So, in the fashion of this character, whoever she is, I have decided to make my own list. Not like my “Bucket List” but this is Seven Things I Want To Do Before I Turn 40. I have two years to compete my list and I’m not exactly sure what all it will entail right now. I do know 4 of the things for sure, and the other 3 are just ideas looming…I guess I’ll post them as I think them through. For now – here is my list. This is not a life-altering list of things that I saw myself doing 25 years ago but just stuff I want to do.

1. Lose 100 pounds and keep it off
2. FIND A NEW JOB
3. Get a tragus piercing (that's the thing that sticks out in front of your ear)
4. Get two more tattoos
5.
6.
7.

So there you have it. I’ll post five, six and seven when they are solidly formed in my head. Let me know if you decide to make a similar list...